“To put them in perspective, I think of being on an airplane. The flight attendant comes down the aisle with her food cart and, eventually, parks it beside my seat. “Can I interest you in the chicken?” she asks. “Or would you prefer the platter of shit with bits of broken glass in it?”
To be undecided in this election is to pause for a moment and then ask how the chicken is cooked.
I mean, really, what’s to be confused about?”
David Sedaris “Undecided” from The New Yorker
There is apparently a species of voter out there in the wild, much coveted by political operatives of both persuasions, which is holding the electoral process hostage. These “undecided voters” (as opposed to swing voters who, it sounds like, have a lot more fun) have been dithering between two diametrically opposed candidates despite having heard from both candidates for more than 18 months throughout one of the longest election cycles in history. Come election day, in the privacy of the voting booth they will exercise their constitutionally guaranteed right to carefully sift through the information, weigh the pros and cons of each candidate, apply their minds for the good of the nation, then flip a coin and leave the entire process up to chance.
Swing voters, on the other hand, like both candidates, or can’t stand either of them. It’s not that they don’t have enough information, it’s that they like Obama’s economic policy, but think McCain is stronger on national security. They are conservative Democrats who voted for Reagan, but also liberal Republicans who liked Clinton. Their standard bearer is Joe Lieberman, the political equivalent of a bisexual switch hitter.
Then there is the angry Hillary voter who, despite the fact that Clinton and Obama may as well be two peas in pod, policy wise, are so bitter about losing the primary, that they have deserted the Democratic party to support McCain, never mind that this makes no political sense at all (See Lynn Forester De Rothschild who considers Obama an elitist – right Lynn, you had me at De). What this species of undecided voter has failed to realize is that the US political system does not rely on a cult of personality like North Korea, Cuba or even Venezuela. The American president is not an autocrat who rules by decree (although W tried his damnedest). In fact, we don’t elect an individual, we elect a team, of which the president is its leader, the person who most ably and eloquently embodies the philosophy of that team. You don’t stop supporting the Lakers just because Kobe loses the captaincy.
Unfortunately, its a reality of political life that these undecideds are significant factor in elections, which is one of the reasons that democracy is imperfect – a government of the people, by the people, for the people takes no account of the fact that many of the people are in fact morons.
“If you shout “fire” in a crowded theater, most people will respond, one way or another. Most of them will run out onto the sidewalk and start to form a lynch mob; some of them will boldly check the theater for combustion-related activities. The undecided voter is the guy still sitting there in the middle of row 43. And not because there wasn’t a fire. This mug just can’t make up his mind whether to burn to death or see the rest of the movie.”
Ben Tripp “The Undecided Voter Examined” in Counterpunch.
Filed under: Election, Politics | Tagged: 2008 Election, Swing Voter, Undecided voters
